I am the world's foremost tunneller. I am Harry Stamper.


You don't believe me?

Then let us begin...

Now, people might not believe me when I say that I am Harry Stamper and that I need to go to Mars and tunnel a shaft down 800 feet to save the world from Armageddon. So to help establish credibility with people I will now give the first part of that and demonstrate how it is that I am the world's foremost authority on tunnelling.

It's another aspect of me being Gimli. Brick I have mastered. I also master stone.

Gimli Destroys the Ring

Tunnelling - Part I

Tunnelling - Part II

So, how am I doing?

Blues Brothers - Chased by the Cops

Survival Skills: The Titanic - Part I

Survival Skills: The Titanic - Part II

Tough audience I guess.

The Blues Brothers - Rawhide

Tunnelling - Part III

Tunnelling - Part IV

What is my name? Ciarán, Gráinne, Marie Lors? I guess it depends on the day.


Tunnelling - Part V

Fletch Lives - Saved!

Tunnelling - Part VI

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Tunnelling - Part VII

With my approach there is no pollution.

I designed this method to be in harmony with nature.

Leo Rojas - El Condor Pasa

In Golden Age we do not have pollution. Not in tunnelling nor in anything I design.

All of my work is designed to be in harmony with nature.

Last of the Mohicans


An Laoch - "Geronimo" le Sheppard as Gaeilge

This is what I will be using to tunnel when on Mars. You see I will already have an unlimited supply of kerosene or hydrogen (I have to check which I can obtain the most easily), water and nitrogen on Mars, thanks to my atmospheric processors that I wrote about in my document "How to Get Air and Water on Mars - Part I" in my section Colonising Mars. That means that I could set up a tunnelling operation on Mars for only about 30 kg extra of cargo. I would need a specially designed blowtorch plus another one as a spare, a crowbar plus another as spare, some rope and a bucket to clear out the debris and a flashlight, plus a spade to dig away the topsoil. That is pretty much it. That is how I could set up my tunnelling operation for only 30 kg of additional equipment in my cargo hold.

MacGyver, wha?

Amhrán na gCupán - Cup Song in Irish - When I'm Gone as Gaeilge

You see Bill and Ted launched a Golden Age where everyone was most excellent to each other. Peace was achieved. Smog went down. Crops went up. They even got to play on Mars.

Bill & Ted’s Gave Rock & Roll to You

People may not believe that I initiated a temporal incursion from the future. That I have lived future timeline after future timeline.

People may not believe that I initiated a temporal incursion to change the past.

People may not believe that I was killed in combat and that I came back from the afterlife.

But it is actually true.

I've been to the past. I've been to the future. I've been all around the afterlife.

Now I have to go to Mars.

Bill and Ted are Time Lords. They travel across time in a telephone box.

Bill and Ted are the Doctor.

Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure

I am the Doctor.

Doctor Who | Terror of the Cybermen


Herr Doktor